100 Monologues – Monologue #50: Learning to Be Myself

100 Monologues is a project where I’m writing monologue scripts, performing, and filming the pieces. Since I’m beginning to dabble in acting, the project is meant as a means for me to acquire more acting experience where I can work on refining my craft. You can find out more about the project here.

Below is the script from the “Learning to Be Myself” monologue. If you’re a student who would like to perform this monologue for class, just make sure you credit me, Maggie Coyle, as the author. For any other use of the script, please contact me.

100 Monologues: #50 Learning to Be Myself

When I was younger, I suffered from pretty bad anxiety. It was so bad, that a lot of my classmates used to think that I didn’t know how to talk at all. Often enough, someone would notice how quiet I was and comment about it with an “Oh, you’re pretty quiet,” or “you don’t talk much, do you?” It drove me crazy whenever someone said anything like that. It was bad enough that I had so much social anxiety that I was afraid that I’d say the wrong thing. But when someone called me out on being quiet, it made my anxiety even worse and I’d grow quieter – just all the more afraid that I’d say the wrong thing.

I lived in my head a lot for years. Until I finally decided that was no way to live. So I started to do the opposite of what I’d default to, to get used to being uncomfortable. So I could outgrow my anxiety.

I used to hate going to happy hours if I didn’t really know anyone there. So I started saying “yes” to going to every happy hour I was invited to. And gradually, I learned how to get used to being uncomfortable in social settings. And eventually, I learned how to be myself in front of strangers.

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